Curious Irony
by Midnight's Shining Star
Summary: "It began out of boredom. It wasn't his fault that he was forced in a psycho organization full of random freak shows and creeps. The least they could do was provide him with some sort of entertainment." Akatsuki is incredibly dull. Irksome emotionless Uchihas don't make anything better. An Itachi/Deidara friendship fic cuz there aren't enough of them. No parings and T for lang.


**A/N: I know, I know I have other fics that need working on. But this bug just wouldn't leave my brain! I've always had this sort of idea in my head, and then it just wouldn't leave me alone, you know? Well, I hope you enjoy it because I worked long and hard on this! I kept changing certain parts until I was certain it was perfect. Though I'm not sure if I caught all the technical errors...but hopefully I did! **

**As for timeline on this; not quite certain. If I had to place it, I would put it sometime shortly after Deidara joins Akatsuki but not too soon after if you know what I mean. Maybe even a year or two later. Not sure. But definitely pre-Shippuden at least. **

**There might be some OOC-ness in this fic towards the end, but I really don't care. It came out the way I wanted it to so I will enjoy it if nobody else does! MWAHAHAHAHA!**

**Ok, just read the fic will ya? ;)**

**I OWN NARUTO! YES! YES I DO! I DOOOOOOOOO~~~~  
*Gets hit over the head by Itachi*  
Itachi: No you don't -_-  
Me: YES I DO! I BOUGHT IT!  
Deidara: In your dreams, un.  
Me: YOU GUYS ARE MEAN! DX *wails and claws at Itachi*  
Deidara *snickers* Midnight doesn't own us even if she thinks she does, un!**

* * *

**_Curious Irony_**

* * *

It began out of boredom.

_Slam!_

The sound of too much force being applied to a poor wooden door reverberated through the area. So much strength had been used, that the sheetrock wall surrounding said door now held a few spider cracks. It was a miracle the object had not fallen off its hinges.

"Bastard, un!"

Deidara crossed his arms and glared at the door, as if his stare would melt it down, leaving only an opening in the dark wall.

"Stop sulking outside the door, brat, and go do something productive, if you even know the meaning of the word."

Sasori's irritated and slightly angry voice was heard from the other side.

Deidara huffed crossly but said nothing as he stalked off. It wasn't his fault that he had been forced into a psycho organization hell bent on world domination - or whatever else it was supposed to be - that was full of random freak shows and creeps. The _least _they could do was provide him with some sort of entertainment.

It was incredibly dull at the Akatsuki base. _Incredibly,_ dull. He had been forbidden to make any of his art inside the base.

"_Deidara, don't make any explosives inside."_

It might have been alright if he had at least been able to do it outside.

"_Don't make any outside either. In fact, don't go outside a 10 meter radius from the base."_

And of course there was more.

"_Don't brawl with the other members, don't destroy the base, don't go in any of the locked rooms, and, Deidara? Are you listening? Don't try anything."_

Who did Pein think he was anyways? It wasn't fair. Pein just _had_ to go on some sort of personal mission and, of course, he had to choose Deidara and Sasori as well as Itachi and Kisame to stay behind and look after the base. It wasn't fair. Deidara would have broken some of Pein's rules by now, if it hadn't been for the slight fact that the man seemed to have eyes everywhere. Even if no one saw him, somehow Pein would know. The bastard.

He had absolutely nothing to do which was why he had wandered into Sasori's room in the first place. Deidara had been hoping to keep his mind off his boredom, but of course it had only ended in another argument about art and Sasori's irritation at his younger partner pestering him in his work. Thence the shouting.

Deidara absolutely refused to try and see if Itachi or Kisame could make things more interesting. Itachi, for obvious reasons, and Kisame was generally around the Uchiha whom he hated, so that was out of the question.

"Stupid danna" he muttered under his breath. What was he supposed to do? Sasori told him to be productive; how was he supposed to do that when nobody wanted him doing, or touching, anything? He pulled out a ball of clay and idly began crushing it and rolling it around in his palm. Pein had said no explosives, he didn't say no clay. Did he? Screw Pein's logic. He didn't remember and didn't care at this point. He wasn't hurting anyone, or anything for that matter.

Somehow, he meandered his way into the kitchen. Maybe there was something edible in there that didn't need hours of preparation or cooking beforehand. He almost stopped and turned around when he saw Itachi sitting at the table eating lunch. If there was one thing Deidara hated more than boredom, it was Uchiha Itachi. But, he had just as much right to be there as the raven, and besides, now that he thought about it, he was hungry. Curses on the stupid Uchiha who just _had_ to be there. Fine. He would grab something quick and leave.

Sending a nasty glare towards Itachi who merely ignored him, he stalked over to the cabinets to find something that didn't require any cooking. Unfortunately, there didn't seem to be a single thing that didn't require being heated up on a stove top or in an oven. It wasn't that he couldn't cook. It was just another one of Pein's "don'ts," as Deidara called them.

"_Don't use any of the kitchen appliances. Nothing that requires heating."_

How was he supposed to eat? He certainly wasn't going to ask the Uchiha bastard behind him. Growling in frustration, he began slamming the doors of the cabinets as he failed to find something.

"You shouldn't do that. You'll break something." The monotone voice of Itachi interrupted the blonde's search for a brief second.

"Mind your own damn business, Uchiha, un." Deidara hissed over his shoulder. He really wasn't in the mood. With Itachi, he never was, but the circumstances made him even more adversarial towards the raven. Regrettably, however, Itachi was right.

"_Don't break anything."_

Damn Pein. Damn Itachi. Damn Akatsuki.

Grabbing a box of raisins and deciding it would do for now, he slammed the door ever so slightly less hard than before, and turned to leave the room.

"If you're hungry you can have some." Itachi stated, motioning towards the food he had prepared on the table.

Deidara turned from the doorway to glare at Itachi, then at the food, then back at Itachi. There was no way he'd ever stoop as low as to ask Uchiha Itachi for help, never mind getting any favors from the older shinobi.

"No thanks" he sneered before turning to leave again.

"Suit yourself" Itachi stated in that same, deeply irksome, monotone.

* * *

It wasn't his fault Sasori was so much of a bastard. It wasn't his fault he couldn't do anything. It wasn't his fault that he had to find _some way_ to occupy himself.

Of course, Sasori blamed it on him though, and of course Sasori was the one Pein listened to. How was he supposed to know the puppet, or creepy doll as he liked to call it, was extremely delicate? He had only wanted to see what made that stupid thing so _interesting_ to his older partner and, with nothing better to do, what did they expect? Of course it was his fault though.

_Don't touch things that don't belong to you, Deidara!_

Insensitive jerks. All of them.

Sasori now had a full week to collect whatever supplies he wanted and work on his freaky hobby. Meanwhile, Deidara had to go on a mission with the object of his hate, Uchiha Itachi. If this was some sort of cruel punishment, it was working. Deidara could be trusted to never again touch one of Sasori's _dolls_.

Cursing the world, and his fate, Deidara quickly sculpted a clay bird and flew ahead of his temporary "partner" as soon as they left for the mission. Sasori may have been an arrogant bastard, but at least he wasn't as bad as the Uchiha. Deidara would finish this mission as quickly as possible to avoid spending any more time than necessary with the raven. How long could such a menial mission take anyways? All they had to do was destroy some building with some scrolls that supposedly had information on Akatsuki. How it happened, he didn't know, nor did he care. Get there. Destroy building. Get back. That was all that mattered. He could have done it on his own were it not for Pein's _insistence_ that Itachi come too. Idiots.

"You shouldn't waste so much chakra." Itachi called up from the ground, his voice not conveying even the slightest hint of emotion.

Deidara scoffed and rolled his eyes, almost wanting to put more chakra into the bird just to spite Itachi.

"Shut up bastard! I know what the hell I'm doing, un."

Itachi merely raised a single eyebrow as if to say, "Oh really?" It was probably the most emotion Deidara had ever seen on the Uchiha's face. He sent an evil glare towards Itachi before refocusing his gaze in front of him. This stupid mission wouldn't take too long if he had anything to say about it.

Soon, their objective was accomplished and the two Akatsuki were on their way back to report to Pein. Deidara had contemplated trying to kill the Uchiha, but waived the idea. Pein would find out, which might prove counterproductive, and though he hated Itachi enough, he wasn't stupid. He still needed to perfect a few techniques before he could get his revenge. No, now wasn't the right time.

Deidara had flown far ahead of his "partner." He didn't care if Itachi couldn't keep up. That was the Uchiha's problem, not his. He wasn't going to stop just to wait for the raven. Itachi was supposed to be the one keeping an eye on him; it didn't go the other way around.

All the same, he decided to land his bird and continue on foot. Though he wouldn't admit it to Itachi, it was a rather chakra-consuming way of travelling. Besides, he was far enough ahead of the other shinobi now. He could think in peace.

_Whoosh!_

Deidara turned just in time to catch a kunai between his fingers and change its trajectory, sending it in the opposite direction. He narrowed his eyes as he scanned the area and silently prepared some of his explosive clay.

_ANBU_

He didn't know where they came from, but it wasn't like it mattered. ANBU were always after Akatsuki, if they could find one. It really meant something to them if they could defeat or kill an Akatsuki. Deidara rolled his eyes. Amateurs.

Unfortunately for Deidara, there seemed to be at least six ANBU, and they had him surrounded. The brief thought passed through his head that _maybe_ he should see if he could alert Itachi somehow. The idea was quickly dismissed. What were a few ANBU? Deidara could handle himself. He would _not_ ask for help from the stupid Uchiha.

As soon as he saw one of the hunter-nin, he sent a volley of explosion in that direction. It was after a few of these that he realized how much chakra he had already used, and just how little he had left. He straightened up. He could still handle this. He was not weak. He refocused his energy and attacked another one of the ANBU.

A sudden swishing through the air and the sick sound of a sharp object slicing through flesh and bone was heard. Deidara's eyes went wide with shock as he saw the long blade of an ANBU's sword jutting out of his abdomen. The sword was pulled out and a fountain of blood came gushing out of the fresh wound. Deidara gasped and pressed one hand to his stomach in an attempt to curb some of the bleeding. With his other hand, he quickly molded a few more explosives and sent them hurtling towards the other ninja.

The ANBU seemed to laugh, though Deidara honestly couldn't tell, and another slicing motion was made, this time the blade was sent digging into his side. Deidara was sent to his knees coughing, a slick pool of his own blood forming around him. His eyes started to lose their focus as the world began spinning in and out. He prepared himself for another blow, but it never came. He heard the ANBU yell in surprise, then pain. He fell to the ground, blood staining his hair and clothes. He noticed a figure crouching in front of him, crimson red staring into ice blue.

"Itachi…"

* * *

His first thought was that someone, Sasori being the person in question, had been trying to wake him up and, in doing so, had rudely pushed him off his bed onto the floor. That is, those _were_ his thoughts until he felt a dull ache coming from his lower abdomen.

_Oh shit_

His eyes snapped open as he sat up all at once, feeling the pain in his stomach spike, causing him to wrap an arm around his waist. He was seething. He just _had_ to let himself get beat by some weak little ANBU, and, what was worse, Itachi had to see it.

"You shouldn't do that."

_Speak of the devil_

Deidara snapped his head around, giving the Uchiha a dark look.

"What's it to you; gonna stop me, un?" he snarled, pushing himself up and onto his feet, grimacing as he did so.

"You shouldn't do that" Itachi repeated, as if Deidara hadn't heard him the first time. "I didn't get to properly treat your injuries. You could get an infection."

Itachi just had to rub it in. Not only had he managed to get himself defeated by a bunch of insignificant ANBU while Itachi watched, but he also had to go and pass out, leaving the raven to take care of him. How he wished Itachi would have just let him die. Well, now he wouldn't accept any more help from the bastard. Itachi was his _enemy_, the person he hated, the person he swore to surpass someday. And he had just made himself look like a weak brat in front of the Uchiha.

"I can take care of myself, un" he spat venomously. "Let's go."

Itachi only stared at Deidara with a blank expression. Deidara huffed angrily and turned away as he stomped off. Damn Itachi.

Several more hours; that was the time the trip would take, but it was only a little over two hours later when Deidara realized Itachi might be _right_. Of course Itachi was right, Itachi was always right. It was another one of the many reasons why Deidara loathed the Uchiha. But he couldn't concede to that fact, no, he could not look weak in front of his sworn enemy.

Fate had other plans, as Deidara discovered. They had decided to stop for a short break. Itachi, being the smart, stuck up Uchiha that he was, decided to go scout ahead while Deidara sat with his back to a rough tree, catching his breath.

He let out a stifled groan as he felt his abdomen throb in pain. His eyes widened slightly as he pressed a hand to his stomach only to feel a warm and sticky wet substance. Hesitantly, as though his delay would deny the inevitable, he lifted his hand to his face and mentally cursed.

_Blood, damnit_

He looked down and saw that his shirt was seeping with the red liquid, and, gingerly lifting up the end of the clothing, he found the bandages to be a blood soaked mess. He had to do something about it. He would _not_ allow himself to appear weak in front of the Uchiha.

He tried to think of what he should do but found his mind moved slowly and seemed hazy. He wiped his forehead with the back of his hand. He felt hot now.

_Damn_

He felt the presence of the Uchiha in front of him.

"Time to go."

Deidara glared weakly at Itachi before shakily getting up only to fall back down. He suddenly felt Itachi come closer.

"Get away from me, un!"

Itachi placed an ice cold hand on the blonde's forehead.

"You're burning up."

Deidara batted the hand away. "I said get away. I don't need your help, un" he growled.

Itachi's eyes shifted downward towards Deidara's blood stained shirt. He moved to lift the fabric but Deidara pushed him away.

"I don't need your help, un" he snarled again.

Itachi frowned ever so slightly. Before Deidara knew what was happening, he pinned the blonde's arms back with one hand while using the other to lift Deidara's shirt and began examining the crimson soaked bandages.

Deidara struggled to remove his hands from Itachi's iron grip.

"Get your hands off me! Go away! I don't need your help, un!"

He was shouting now; didn't Itachi understand that he wanted to be left alone?

"I don't need your help! Stop it! Let go of me! I can take care of myself!"

Itachi lifted his head so that his gaze met the enraged blonde's.

"Clearly" was all he said. He didn't sound at all sarcastic, but then, he didn't sound like anything at all. It was highly irritating.

Itachi released his grip on Deidara's arms, but before the blonde could actually do anything he felt Itachi removing the now useless bandages from his stomach. He hissed in pain and closed his eyes as he began to feel dizzy.

Itachi mumbled something that sounded like, "I told you you'd get an infection," but he wasn't sure. He opened his eyes again and tried to make a feeble attempt to get away from his enemy, but the world was dancing around him now and he could barely hold his head up. He had the slight sensation of falling and thought his head might make impact with something, but was surprised when it didn't happen.

He tried to glare at Itachi; he didn't need any favors, but the Uchiha seemed unfazed and only laid the blonde gently on the ground. He felt Itachi remove the rest of the bandages, and he winced when he felt pressure being applied to his injuries. Deidara felt himself shivering as Itachi tightly tied pieces of cloth around his lower torso and then placed his cold hand on the blonde's forehead once more. He tried to suppress the groan of pain, but to no avail. He felt Itachi's gaze on him and suddenly felt a layer of warmth being placed over his body. Then, the sensation of being lifted in the air.

He was angry. He truly was. He wanted to shout at the Uchiha, tell the raven to put him down. He didn't want Itachi thinking him weak, or in need of any help whatsoever. Yet, his body wouldn't cooperate, and instead he found his head resting against Itachi's chest, half lidded eyes starting to close, as the Uchiha started off to who knows where.

* * *

Waking was difficult. His body felt much too stiff, and sore, and he wanted nothing more than to drift off into unconsciousness again. Yet, he remembered what happened and he wasn't going to let himself be taken care of by the stupid Uchiha if he could help it. He started to sit up slowly, wincing a bit when he felt a pain in his stomach, though it seemed to have receded into more of a dull ache now. He looked down and saw the clean, constricting bandages that were wrapped around his waist.

"Don't get up."

Of course Itachi was right there. Deidara turned to glare at the Uchiha, who had his back turned to the blonde as he poked at a small fire. Curses. Deidara almost thought about getting up, just to spite Itachi, but he knew it was unwise and as he didn't want a repeat of the earlier incident, he decided he would just have to deal with it for the time being.

Itachi got up and made his way over to the blonde before pressing a small pill along with a glass of water into Deidara's hand. "For the infection" he informed the blonde before turning back. Deidara scowled nastily at Itachi before swallowing the round object. Where Uchiha Itachi had gotten antibiotics from, he didn't know, but it wasn't like he cared either.

"Go back to sleep. We're leaving in the morning." Deidara grumbled but lay back down. It wasn't like he could do much of anything else anyways. He was still wondering about something though.

"How long-"

"Three days" Itachi responded before Deidara could even get the question out. Damn bastard.

Deidara rolled angrily over onto his side, ignoring the dull spike in pain from his stomach. He was in for it now. Not only did he have to live with the fact that _Itachi_, of all people, had to see him as weak and useless, but also, Pein was going to be extremely furious at him for being the cause of his and Itachi's late return.

_Damn_

* * *

"You're late" the image of Akatsuki's leader flickered in front of them. They almost never saw Pein face to face, even when they were in the same building. Deidara honestly didn't know why. It made no sense to him.

"We finished the mission, un." Deidara said curtly. He wasn't pleased with Pein in the least.

"What took you so long?" Pein asked pointedly.

Deidara sucked in a breath. If he didn't say something, Itachi would. He might as well get it over with.

"It was my fault, leader-sama. I delayed our return by choosing a longer return route that was being patrolled by ANBU. I apologize."

Deidara's head snapped to the side, the slight shock apparent on his face as he raised an eyebrow. Uchiha Itachi was covering for _him_? This was news.

"Very well." Pein didn't appear to be completely convinced. "Do you have something to say, Deidara?"

Deidara snapped his mouth shut, only recently becoming aware that he had let it hang agape and had been staring from Itachi to Pein.

"No sir, un."

"Fine" Pein's eyes shifted back to Itachi. "Don't let it happen again. You two are dismissed." The image of Pein faded out leaving only Deidara and the Uchiha in the room.

"What the hell was that about, un?!" Deidara shouted, turning once again to angrily glare at the Uchiha. Itachi returned the blonde's angry gaze with that highly irritating blank expression.

"You're welcome" was all he said before turning to leave the room.

"Hey! Get back here! I never said I was grateful! Come back here Uchiha! You didn't answer my question, un!"

Deidara huffed angrily as he left the room. What did it matter anyways? He wasn't going to be in trouble with Pein; common courtesy demanded that he be grateful to Itachi. But there was no way in a million years that he would actually _thank_ the Uchiha. Let Itachi do what he wanted. Still, the question remained.

_Why the hell would he do something like that?_

* * *

Somehow, Deidara found himself in the habit of wandering into Sasori's room whenever he was bored or had nothing better to do. It wasn't really a good or smart habit to have - more often than not it ended with some sort of shouting argument about art or Deidara getting in trouble with his older partner. Yet, all the other members irked the blonde to no end. At least Sasori could be tolerable.

Still, most of the time Deidara found that he was talking to himself. Sasori almost never took part in conversation with the blonde unless Deidara somehow made him angry or contradicted his personal beliefs on art. He would probably be better off in his own room, talking to the wall. Walls don't threaten to turn you into puppets if you get them angry – but, then again, it at least gave the façade that he wasn't crazy, talking to himself, even though that was _essentially_ what he was doing.

"This place could use some excitement you know, un."

"…"

"I mean, it's far too _boring_ here. What the hell are we even supposed to be doing, un?"

"…"

"Nothing, that's what. Aren't there _any_ missions to do? Are we just supposed to sit around all day, un?"

"…"

"There's gotta be _something_ to make this place more interesting. What if we-"

"No"

"But-"

"Whatever you're thinking about, stop."

"But Sasori no _dan-na_!"

"No. Now get out of here. You're irritating me."

"But there's nothing to do, un!"

"There's plenty to do."

"Like what?"

"I don't know. Just find something. I told you, you're irritating me."

"So there isn't anything then, un"

"…"

"See? This is why the place needs some excitement. We could-"

"Deidara, no."

That should have been his queue to shut up completely and leave. Should have.

"Oh come on danna, don't be such a spoil sport, un!"

Deidara pushed himself up into a sitting position from where he had been lying on Sasori's bed and crossed his arms.

"All you do is sit in here and play with your stupid puppets anyways. It wouldn't kill you to change it up, un."

He got up and crossed the room to one of Sasori's tables, fingering a few things on the desk.

"_Deidara_"

It was both a warning to stop talking and to leave Sasori's things on the desk alone. Common sense dictated that he just listen to his older partner. Still he continued to go through the various items that belong to the puppet master. Call it a momentary lapse of judgment, or just plain stupidity, but the truth was, Deidara didn't quite _want_ to leave his partner alone. Like he stated before, there really was nothing to do.

He picked up a small model marionette and began fiddling with the various aspects of it, not being too surprised when he accidentally pushed a button on it and a small blade popped out of a hidden compartment somewhere. They were _accurate_ models after all; hidden weapons and everything included.

"Chill danna, there's no reason to get so worked up, un. You won't even let me tell you what my idea is!"

A moment later, he dropped the model he had been playing with and uttered a, "shit, un" as the object clattered to the floor. He had pushed another one of the buttons and the blade that had suddenly protruded from the puppet had sliced his fingers open.

Sasori whirled around angrily to face his partner.

"What the hell was that?" Sasori demanded.

"Hey, relax, it's nothing to get worked up over. See?" Deidara bent down to pick up the marionette and show Sasori. "No harm done. Anyways, it's not like it's anything that important, un."

Sasori sucked in a breath and closed his eyes.

"Deidara, out, _now_"

"Aw, c'mon, don't be that way danna!"

Deidara set the model back on the table and picked up a small vial filled with a white-ish fluid. He thought it must have been one of Sasori's poisons, though it was odd for it to be over on the table rather than with Sasori's stash. Unless it was something else…

"Hey danna, what's this, un?"

"Put that down, Deidara, and _get, out!_"

"But-" Deidara began, setting the bottle on the edge of the table. It wobbled a bit before toppling off the desk and landing on the floor with a crash.

Sasori opened his eyes and glared at his younger partner.

"Eheh, oops?" Deidara said with a sheepish grin. Truth be told, he wasn't altogether sorry, at least not for breaking the vial. Sasori was such a killjoy sometimes; no, he was only sorry for what might happen to him since he dropped the bottle.

"_Deidara" _Sasori growled, getting up, a killing aura surrounding him. "Get. Out. _Now_. Before I make you wish you weren't alive anymore."

"Yeah, yeah, I hear ya. Geez, you sure are grumpy. It's _just _a stupid bottle, un."

Deidara just missed being impaled with a few of Sasori's _special_ senbon as he scrambled out of the room.

"Pfft, stick in the mud, un." Deidara mumbled under his breath. Sighing, he opened his fist to reveal the small marionette he had been playing with earlier. "At least I still have this, un" he said, twisting his face in sort of a crooked smile. He didn't think Sasori would miss it much. Maybe he could stuff it full of clay and blow it up; at least that would be amusing. Then Sasori's so-called art really would be art!

Unfortunately, Sasori did miss it, as discovered when Deidara sensed the puppet master coming out of his room.

"Give it back brat."

"Give what back danna, un?" Deidara asked innocently. He could have some fun with Sasori.

"Don't play dumb with me, brat. I want my model back. _Now_."

"Hm, you mean this ugly thing, un?" He asked, holding up the small puppet.

Sasori narrowed his eyes, obviously not pleased with the ugly remark.

"Hand it over"

"Nuh-uh. I'm bored, un"

"_Deidara_"

"Yeah?"

Sasori stepped threateningly towards the blonde who was beginning to wonder if this was worth all the trouble. After all, Sasori wasn't looking all too friendly at the moment.

"I will give you until the count of three. One…two…"

Deidara saw this as his queue to leave and took off running down the hall.

"GET BACK HERE BRAT!"

"You're gonna have to catch me first danna, un!" Deidara said, laughing madly as he ran. He could sense Sasori behind him and knew that if the puppet master caught up to him, there would be consequences. What kind of consequences, he wasn't sure, but he certainly did not want to stick around and find out.

It probably would have been best for him if he had just given Sasori back his mini-doll, but, it was fun to see Sasori riled up sometimes. Plus, he had nothing better to do.

Deidara led Sasori on a chase, turning sharply down corridors and dashing madly through rooms. He came to a screeching halt, however, when he realized he had run out of places to run. He turned to face his fuming partner.

"Alright, alright, here, un" he handed the puppet to Sasori who snorted and rolled his eyes.

"You're lucky I don't feel like finding a new partner right now, brat." Sasori grumbled. Deidara simply shrugged.

Sasori shook his head and turned to leave as Deidara smirked. Slowly, he raised his hands, forming a seal. "Katsu!"

Sasori stopped in his tracks and slowly, _slowly_ turned to face his young blonde partner who had a mischievous grin plastered on his face.

"Deidara"

"Yeah?"

"I suggest you run" and with that, Sasori immediately flung a barrage of senbon towards the blonde.

Deidara ducked past his partner and ran. So maybe blowing up Sasori's model wasn't the best of ideas, now that his partner was currently trying to kill him, but it sure as hell was _funny_.

At least, it _was_ funny, until Deidara realized just how _mad_ he made Sasori and just how hard his partner was really trying to kill him.

"Aw, c'mon danna! It can't be that bad, un!" He called back to his enraged partner.

"GET THE HELL BACK HERE YOU BRAT!"

_Apparently it can be_

After being chased for the past fifteen minutes, Deidara was really beginning to wish he _hadn't_ provoked Sasori so much. Finding the closest room he could, he dashed into it, quickly locked the door, and masked his chakra in hopes that Sasori would just run past him. He gave a quick sigh of relief when he heard Sasori's footsteps growing fainter by the second.

"Close one, un" he mumbled to himself. He sat with his back to the door. He wasn't about to go back out just yet. That's when he noticed the presence of someone _else_ in the room.

Keeping his chakra hidden, he peeked around the corner and, much to his dismay, saw Itachi. Deidara quickly pulled his head back, cursing the state of affairs. He knew he wasn't in the raven's room – he wasn't _that_ stupid, this was just some spare room in the base – so what was Itachi doing there?

Deidara contemplated leaving but decided that even Itachi was better than facing the wrath of Sasori at the moment. Besides, he didn't think the Uchiha even noticed him or, at least Itachi gave no signs of recognizing the blonde was there.

Of course, this was probably a stupid assumption to make. Most likely, Itachi did in fact know Deidara was there, but just didn't care. This fact somewhat annoyed Deidara, and he grumbled quietly to himself about stupid perceptive Uchiha's, but stopped when he heard what sounded like a sniffle. Slowly, as if he disbelieved his ears, he turned his head around the corner to watch the Uchiha again.

He was probably just hearing things, and he started to turn back when he thought he saw something wet drop to the floor. Deidara shook his head and tilted it curiously. It couldn't be, Uchiha Itachi was, _crying_?

Deidara stood in a sort of dumb shock for a moment. Uchiha Itachi _never_ displayed emotion. Ever. This was one of the reasons Deidara hated the Uchiha so much. However, this moment was starting to disprove some of his theories about Itachi. The raven was human. He had his moment of weakness, like anybody else. And Deidara had seen it. How curious.

He stood, quite unsure of what to do. Now he was almost certain Itachi didn't know he was there. If Itachi had known, he surely wouldn't have let Deidara see him like this. Deidara tilted his head to the side, contemplating. Itachi was his _enemy_, so he really shouldn't care. That didn't stop him from being interested though, and perhaps he could use this as blackmail later.

He took a few steps forward before clearing his throat and crossing his arms.

"Well what the bloody hell is the matter with you, Uchiha? Hm?"

There were no visible signs that anything changed with Itachi, but Deidara could have sworn that the Uchiha tensed a bit as he turned to face the younger Akatsuki.

Itachi stared at him with, as usual, an expressionless look before getting right in Deidara's face and growling, "You didn't see anything. _Got that_?"

Deidara would have to say it was one of the only times he was scared, truly scared, of the Uchiha. Before he just annoyed the blonde and irritated him. Now Itachi actually seemed rather menacing as the blood red eyes swirled a mere inches in front of him, staring him down. The blonde swallowed thickly before finding his voice again.

"Relax, like anyone would listen to me anyways, un" he scoffed nervously. Itachi looked the blonde over, and noting the rather wide-eyed look Deidara was giving him, backed off a bit.

Itachi's face quirked into a small frown as he stared at Deidara still. Deidara huffed, slightly angry but still curious.

"So what are you doing in here anyways, un?"

"I should ask you the same question." Itachi's monotone voice betrayed the slightest hints of being annoyed with the blonde for intruding, and Deidara smirked to himself as he thought of how he had been able to see Uchiha Itachi showing _emotion_.

"Danna's trying to kill me, un" he said simply, as if that explained everything.

"You should apologize"

Deidara narrowed his eyes and tapped his foot.

"How do you know I even did anything, un?" he asked crossly.

"You usually do. Even if you didn't, he probably thinks you did."

"Tch, no way! He's the one being a major asshole, un!"

"Perhaps. But you should not have provoked him in the first place."

Deidara grumbled to himself. Why did that damn Uchiha have to be right about everything?

"Well there's nothing better to do! You people are serious killjoys, un."

"You enjoy being chased around by an ill-tempered puppet master who wants to kill you because you destroyed something of his?" Itachi quirked an eyebrow.

Deidara snorted, willing himself not to laugh. Apparently he wasn't the only one who thought that way about his partner.

"Hey, at least it's something to do, un!"

"There are better ways to use your time."

"Like?"

"Like training. Or why don't you go outside and use your clay?"

"Leader-sama won't let me do anything. And – wait a minute, why the hell am I telling _you_ anything?! It's not like you understand, un!"

"I would suggest calming down, unless you want Sasori to hear you."

"Tch, I hate you, un" Deidara pouted, childishly.

"I'm sorry to hear that."

Both shinobi stared, or in Deidara's case glared, at each other for a bit until Deidara remember why he was even talking to his arch nemesis in the first place.

"So what was your deal anyways, un?"

"None of your business" came the answer, as Itachi's Sharingan started swirling again.

"Ok, ok, calm down Itachi-hime. Personal business I guess. What was it, un?"

Itachi closed his eyes for a moment. He really seemed to be annoyed with the blonde.

Deidara looked past Itachi and noticed something on the table. Walking up to it, he saw a picture of a woman with long black hair who looked an awful lot like Itachi.

"Who's this, un?" He didn't miss the deadly aura Itachi seemed to be radiating at the moment.

"My mother" Itachi stated in his monotone voice, which was starting to strangely sound like a low growl to Deidara.

"Hm" Deidara looked at the picture again.

"It's her birthday"

Deidara's head snapped up at the surprisingly voluntary information.

"You miss her"

Itachi seemed to glare at Deidara, though his expression hadn't changed in the slightest.

"You killed her, but you didn't want to. You feel guilty and…you miss her, un" Deidara clarified. He had absolutely no idea why he was saying that. Maybe it was because he could sympathize. Still, Itachi was his enemy. He shouldn't have any empathy for the raven.

Itachi only stared at Deidara with what one could assume was a confused expression – confused as to why Deidara cared. He was asking himself the same question.

"I'm sure she forgives you, ya know? She looks like she would…I think so. Besides, you're too perfect not too, un" he mumbled under his breath a bit, not quite meaning Itachi to hear all that, but somehow the raven had all the same.

"I thought you hated me"

"I do!" Deidara protested, shouting angrily and glaring at the Uchiha. "You annoy me with those stupid eyes of yours, un!"

Itachi just stood there and, if Deidara hadn't known any better, he would have said Itachi was smirking a bit at his outburst.

"Brat! Where the hell are you?" Sasori's muffled shouting could be heard through the door. Suddenly, the puppet master burst into the room.

"There you are you little imp. Get over here so that I can teach you a lesson you won't forget!"

Deidara's eyes widened a fraction as he noticed the weapons his partner was brandishing. Quickly, he ducked behind Itachi who was conveniently standing right next to him now. He might hate the Uchiha, but that didn't mean he couldn't use the raven as a meat shield between him and Sasori.

Sasori took a step closer. "Itachi, move out of my way" Sasori growled.

"Leader-sama will be angry if you injure him Sasori-san" Itachi stated matter-of-factly.

"I don't give a damn. He needs to be taught a lesson."

"I'm sure Deidara is very sorry."

Deidara frowned. What did Itachi think he was doing? He was _not_ sorry! He looked towards his fuming partner. Maybe he was a bit sorry.

Itachi pulled the blonde out from behind him. "Right Deidara?"

Deidara sent a nasty look towards Itachi before turning towards Sasori who seemed to be waiting for the blonde's response.

"Yeah, um, sorry danna, un"

Sasori huffed and quirked an eyebrow up.

"You think that's going to cut it brat?"

"Well, what more do you want? I'm sorry ok!" He shouted. He wasn't pleased with the situation, Itachi, or Sasori at all.

Sasori looked from Itachi to Deidara and back again then smirked as an idea crossed his mind.

"Fine. Keep an eye on him, Itachi. I don't want to see you for the rest of the day brat."

Deidara's mouth dropped in surprise.

"Danna, wait! You can't do that! Why do I have to be stuck with Itachi? Hey, danna! It's not fair, un!"

"Shut up Deidara. You brought this on yourself, may I remind you. Now leave me alone."

Deidara stepped forward to say something again but Itachi grabbed his wrist and pulled him back, shaking his head. Deidara snatched his wrist away and sneered at the Uchiha.

"This is all your fault! I hate you, un!"

"I believe it is your fault. And you have established that already."

"Just get away from me, un!"

"I'm supposed to watch you."

"I don't need you to babysit me!"

"Sasori thinks otherwise."

"Sasori-danna's a stupid prick, un!"

"Maybe"

"And! – Wait, you agree?"

"He's been known to be rather irritable and unpleasant. The sooner you learn that the better."

"No kidding, un"

There was a moment of silence.

"Itachi?"

"Yes?"

"Why did you cover for me, with leader-sama I mean, un?"

"You had been punished enough, I think. I knew leader-sama would not be as hard on me."

"Yeah, but why? Don't you hate me, un?"

"That's hard to explain. And no, you hate me."

"But you're always looking down on me and my art, un!"

"I don't think that"

"And you're an emotionless bastard!"

"I cannot refute that statement"

Deidara crossed his arms and frowned at his so-called "enemy."

"Well, at least you admit it, un"

Itachi sighed.

"You still haven't told me why, un"

"You're a kid"

"Hey! You're not much older than me you know, un!"

"Two years is enough"

"That doesn't make you better than me, un!"

"No, it makes you younger than me; you remind me of someone."

"Yeah but you – huh?"

"You remind me of someone"

Deidara narrowed his eyes.

"Come on, let's go outside. You can use your clay; don't worry about leader-sama."

"Fine. But Itachi?"

"Yes?"

"I'm still going to kill you someday, un."

Itachi only gave a small, quick smile.

_So alike yet so different_

* * *

Deidara and Itachi sat in the kitchen playing a game of chess. Itachi was, of course, winning, but that didn't stop Deidara from trying every time to beat the Uchiha.

"Checkmate"

"Damnit! You're cheating with your stupid eyes, un!"

"No, I'm simply better at this game than you"

"Arrogant bastard! I'll beat you, just watch, un!"

Itachi sighed.

"You have yet to follow through"

Deidara grumbled to himself.

"Well, set up your pieces Uchiha. We're not done yet, un"

Itachi shook his head.

"I think you need a break"

"Never, un!"

Itachi rolled his eyes.

"You're too obsessed"

They began playing again with the same results seemingly coming into place. That was, until, "Checkmate, un!" Deidara exclaimed happily. "There! See, I told you, un"

Itachi shook his head.

"I concede; here, have some." Itachi held out a bag of dango to the blonde who popped a stick in his mouth. He had soon learned that even Itachi had some sort of food fetish and always carried around a bag of dango, though most never knew it.

The two turned and looked towards the kitchen entrance as Sasori made his way in, a look of apparent shock on his face.

"Hey danna, un" Deidara stated nonchalantly while Itachi calmly began putting away the chess set.

"What's going on here brat?"

"Nothing much, what's with that look, un?"

Sasori simply looked from Itachi to Deidara as if his eyes might be playing tricks on him. Kisame also chose this point in time to walk into the kitchen.

"Hey what's-"

Kisame's eyes almost bulged out of their sockets as he saw Deidara and Itachi sitting across from each other, with no death threats being uttered, no nasty glares, and, most confusing of all, they almost seemed to be _enjoying_ each other's company.

"Wh-what's going on?" He asked Sasori who seemed just as bewildered as he.

Sasori shook his head.

"Is something wrong?" Itachi asked in his normal monotone.

Sasori's mouth opened and closed a few times before he finally asked, "Are you alright brat? Do you feel sick or something?"

"No danna, I'm fine, why, un?"

"Are you sure? What about you Itachi? Am I missing something here?"

"I am fine, as well as Deidara. I do not see any issue here."

"What are you two _doing_?" Kisame asked.

"Playing chess; I beat Itachi, un" Deidara answered innocently, nibbling on his dango.

"It took you a while" Itachi countered

"Whatever Uchiha" Deidara said with a roll of his eyes.

Sasori and Kisame both turned to look at each other with the same, confused, shocked, and slightly scared expression. Slowly, they both left the room.

"What _was_ that?" Kisame asked.

"I have no idea" Sasori responded faintly.

Deidara snickered as Kisame and Sasori left the kitchen.

"They seemed shocked, un"

"Maybe we should not have scared them…"

"Aw, don't be like that Itachi! It's funny! Didn't you see the looks on their faces? Priceless, un!"

"I think we may have scarred them for life."

"Probably" Deidara tilted his head, grinning wickedly. "Hey, next time they come in we should act 'normal' again, un. Then they'll really freak out!"

Itachi shook his head.

"You never cease to amaze me"

"C'mon Itachi, live a little, un!" Deidara took a huge bite out of his dango and munched it happily. If someone told him a mere two weeks ago that he would be friends with Uchiha Itachi, well, they might not be in existence anymore. How ironic, Deidara thought, that his worst enemy could become his best friend. Itachi wasn't that bad; at least he could understand Deidara better than the others, though he still enraged the blonde sometimes.

"Hey 'Tachi"

"Yes?"

"For the record, I'm still gonna kill you some day, un"

"I wouldn't expect anything less"

* * *

**A/N: Owari! :D It was 21 pages in Word so I hope someone enjoys it. And I'm pretty sure you guys know who Itachi's comparing Deidara too. If you don't...my bad. But I don't think it's that hard to guess...**

**And, there you have it. The idea that would not leave my head. I have another one sort of similar to this which I may or may not publish. Depending on how this is received. **

**As always, leave a review please!~  
Deidara: What if they don't want to leave a review, un?  
Me: Then you can blow them up for me  
Deidara: :D  
Itachi: But then you will scare away any potential reviewers  
Me: Good point...  
Deidara: HEY! Killjoy, un -_-  
Me: I suppose they'll just have to leave a review then! *grins wickedly*  
Deidara: YAY! ^_^  
Itachi: *sweatdrop***

***"Hime" means princess. Yes, Deidara is insulting Itachi; what did you expect? **


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